Judgement is a poison. It eliminates the frankness and vulnerability gained through honest discussion. It hides problems, and is the source of much grief in your personal relationships.
Businesses and product launches fail because you were afraid ‘of what other people would think/say’. Relationships and love are won and lost with the fear of judgement.
But what is judgement and how can you create a life free of it?
Judgement — simply is fear of other people’s opinion of us for our thoughts and actions.
Examples:
- Fear to speak up in meetings for asking “dumb questions”
- Fear to share how you REALLY feel with your spouse
- Fear to engage with the business team (imposter syndrome)
- Failing to create / write / speak in public .. again imposter syndrome
- Fear to air guitar, karaoke in the kitchen, or dance with your wife .. because well .. you aren’t a professional
You get it — judgement slows, impedes, hides, and erodes the good moments and momentum in your life. Now what do we do?
Shedding Judgement is in your own hands
Judgement is your mental manifestation of what MIGHT other people think, feel, say, or do as a result of our actions. There is truth to these thoughts. People will have thoughts and reactions — but does that change who you are inside? NO.
People may react poorly, but they may also EMBRACE and love your idea. They may love who you really are. They might!
When you recognize that to NOT act on your thoughts, dreams, and authentic self is to live a LIE. You were not born to pretend to be someone else. You were born and have experienced the harships and good moments to be WHO you are today. To embrace your true self — speak honestly. Share your careful thoughts. Take initiative where you see you can help. Tell that boy / girl what is sincerely in your heart.
See how much better you feel after that moment, and use that to support your growth.
Hiding what you really want and are inside only leads to regret. Something I have shared deeply on, and is the #1 disappointment of those on their last days on Earth. Regret of what they didn’t do, say, or try. You see — Judgement from others is what created that regret.
There are 2 sides to every moment and now that we’ve tackled our internal monologue, let’s address our support of judgement.
Tough love — you need to have empathy and not be the judger!
Are you judging another? Do you find yourself sniping, gossiping, and “making fun” of others for what they say and do? These are all acts of judgement and a habit you can easily change with awareness. You see, you are empowered because you know the real truth as the judge and jury.
You too aren’t perfect, you have flaws, and you have made the same mistakes that you are judging others for having…. is that who you really want to be in life? I think not, if you’ve made it this far, as it not only spreads hate.. it limits your own huge potential.
Massive upside to those who grow others
One thing you’ll find in business and in life. There are those who build people up, and there are those who cut them down. When you build up people you create a community, a family, a team, a business, a life full of positivity and impact.
Embrace this side of you — eliminate your judgement of others, and of yourself.
About the author
- Coach, Mentor, 3x author
- 24 Year technology executive
- Helped launch clouds for EMC and Cisco
- GOOGLE, Microsoft FEDRAMP & ISO 27001 — Oversaw / Part of team deploying / Managed Cloud Compliance
James — executive to deliver products to market; author; inventor; speaker, and technologist with decades of experience across all technology and cybersecurity. (LinkedIN to connect and engage)
James is a leader that has balanced product market success with rapid regulations, cyber, customer demands, and supplier challenges at Honeywell, Google, and Microsoft in the recent past. Successful in building large teams and influence driven initiatives that have saved millions in new revenue and savings for Honeywell. Passionate about the product creation process; the value of intertwining privacy and quality together, and the opportunity present through branding and value.
James leads with the Senior Leadership across the globe and partners for critical priorities at Honeywell to identify new innovation opportunities through strategy and practical implementations within the Azure cloud, machine learning, artificial intelligence, and industrial products.
James has grown business and brands from zero to $50MM as a founder, owner, and within the Fortune 200. A track record built with wins and losses, that are always building on his network across the globe with the best technologists and great peers to bring the best talent and resources to each project.
James began transforming the Honeywell supply chain strategy that have delivered efficiencies (reduction of idea to signature) and pragmatic development of partnerships that have expanded our market offerings across Honeywell.
James’ continues to lead and advise on their cloud strategy, cloud innovation, cost consolidation, cyber security, and compliance across the various businesses within Honeywell.